Mar 14, 2009. It's the ultimate episode of season three, but only in the chronological sense. Our intro somehow leads us to question Stompin Tom's obvious neediness. How many law degrees, posses, discount cards or names does this guy want? Jesus. Anyway, to cheer us up Culture.ca has apparently now included us in their podcast directory after several months of considering any ultimatums (ultimata?) we may or may not have sent their way. It's still not clear whether the collapse of their webpage was a result of including us. Either way, thanks a lot, culture.ca! Expect your meat tray/fruit cake by email. And congratulations for really upping the pressure on Conan! If you downloaded this podcast via culture.ca or Conan O'Brien's website, please let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Mar 4, 2009. We're back! After a somewhat lengthy hiatus during which we were busy with, er, some other things, we've returned with a long-awaited next episode. Maybe someone was awaiting it. Anyone? Hello? Whatever. In this week's Foody Goody Session we feature Round 2 of our Who's That Word: Competitive Eating Edition contest. If you've forgotten during our absence, the point (yes, there is a point) is for each of the others to guess the meaning of Warren's nominated technical term from the competitive eating world. Riveting shit, let me assure you. In what other show can you get references to the Bible, Seinfeld, dropkicks, the laws of Physics, wet bread, and a reacharound all at once? Not many, I guess. I wonder why not? If you know, email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Feb 16, 2009. It turns out John's cat George meows on command. And sometimes, it meows just because it wants to. Do you care? I didn't think so. And who the fuck cares about a calendar about narrow boats? Did you even know about these? You will by the end of this show, whether you care to or not. Turns out, they're long, and pretty narrow. Not like a Viking boat, though. Venice style. Surprisingly narrow. Especially the modern boats, which are slightly narrower. Somehow all this talk of boats leads to Australian penis nicknames. You really should have expected as much. If you know where we can find a calendar about narrow boats or Australian penis nicknames, please let us know via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Feb 1, 2009. If you are easily offended by misogynistic questions, or perhaps even if you aren't, you might want to skip this week's episode. It centers on the latest segment of "Your Body and You", in which T-Bone requests the development of a certain litmus test that probably doesn't involve acidity. Should it involve communication, or is that, as some of us suspect, a really bad idea? Maybe a measuring device of some sort? How does one deal with the stretching? Could you start with ping-pong balls, and then work your way up? Or is that another really bad idea? Does a girl want some kind of prosthesis? Like a puppet? Or fuzzy vice? Regardless of how important this may or may not be, send us your ideas for solving this problem by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Jan 21, 2009. Listen closely, because the passing trucks are noisy today. This week's episode features another segment of Dictionary Plus, in which Warren introduces an exciting new contest: Who's that Word: Competitive Eating Edition. Warren will name a term used in the competitive eating circuit, and the others have to decide what it means. The closest guess will be awarded a point in some fashion that will no doubt contribute to one's chances of a reach-related-reward. Widen your stance a bit, shake things out, and turn your hat backwards in anticipation of this round: you'll need all the space you can manage, because today's term is "dropping the mule". We have done our best to keep ass-related puns to a minimum, but in case you were expecting something, our best isn't very good. Have you read any good books on competitive eating lately? Send us your recommendations by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Jan 7, 2009. Happy New Year! In the first episode of 2009, we boldly attempt to name 5 sports in which the danger and risk are maximized, but the respect gained by participating in the sport is minimized. Warren's suggested example is the luge. Sorry, lugers, but he's got a point. We come up with several other candidates, most of which seem to involve combinations of two other things, e.g., skiing and jumping, punting and tackling, croquet while horse riding, skateboarding while sun tanning, and sword fighting while being without pants (hey, the danger has to be maximized, remember)? Let us know if we neglected to mention your own sport, or if you wish to sign our petition to renew television coverage of the lumberjack games (email us at maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Dec 17, 2008. This year we bring you a brand new Tedmas special! Luc starts things off by revealing how the British are woefully deficient in eggnog and eggnog lore. Then it turns out that even we don't know what nog is. So we make some shit up, with some help from the internet. Then raise a glass of cornnog and join our discussion of redundant food names. Can you resolve the weakness in the naming conventions of redundant names? What other kinds of gum are there than chewing gum? You can probably guess where we're headed with this topic, but give us a listen anyway. You might be surprised about how many types of gum there are! Even if some of them are not really culturally accepted. Send us your jolly holly Tedmas greetings by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Dec 10, 2008. What is the purpose of pants? Don't be so sure you know the answer until you've given us a listen. We could save you all kinds of showering time! Then in the Superhero's phone booth, Warren introduces Sabretooth Man! Get it? He has...sabreteeth! It's not clear how he manages to eat without injuring himself, nor what his main strategies are for defeating villains, but Warren insists he's effective in fighting crime, and even illustrates a scenario through which Sabretooth man might prevail, which involves stealth and biting the sweet spot. And maybe a gun (for long range fighting). Listen and then judge for yourself! Let us know what you think via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Dec 3, 2008. In this week's Urban Legend segment, Warren discusses the recent discovery of sabre-toothed deer, which once lurked among regular grazing deer and pounced upon unsuspecting herbivores. A key aspect of their predatory habits (how this was learned from fossils is not revealed) was to keep their heads in the grass to conceal their enormous teeth, a strategy that may or may not be shared by certain mimics of female fireflies. You can probably imagine that given all the discussion of neck width, the origin of the species, and the mechanics of hybrid sex, we're going to need more than one episode to fully treat this topic. If so, your imagination is in luck! We'll have more sabre teeth in next week's episode. If you would rather we don't, you can email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Nov 24, 2008. Have you got a soothing neck or face? After an unsuccessful attempt to spin the tracks, Luc describes his trip to Belgium (pause for laughs) where he visited the spa in Spa, and received a facial. Apparently it was kind of relaxing in spite of all the goop covering his face. Would you rather be the facial giver or the facial receiver? Really? Even if you knew that there would be all kinds of gunk coming out of someone's head? You're a weirdo. Anyway, we also discuss new possible patterns of eyebrow grooming – you might want to try one of our suggestions and break new ground in the realm of facial hair fashion. Then, after discussing whether place names are misleadingly bold advertisements, we discuss different massage techniques. Consensus: if you're going to get a massage from a dude, he had better be beating the piss out of you. Finally, we chat about the easy-listening music that characterizes any experience at a spa or thermal bath. If you are a new-age artist or masseur and can give us hints on how to stay awake at work, please email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Nov 13, 2008. Good morning AND welcome. This episode begins with another Nature Walk. Hooray! Warren was watching a movie by M. Night Shyamalan, and the one thing that shattered his suspension of disbelief was a quotation of Einstein on a science classroom board suggesting that if bees vanished, humans would quickly go extinct. Strangely, Warren is more sceptical than Luc about this "fact", perhaps because Luc considers the importance of bees for humans to stretch slightly beyond their delicious contributions of honey to our world. Then in Good Idea/Bad Idea, Warren asks if hybrid car owners deserve special nearby parking spaces. What about walkers and cyclists? Don't they deserve special parking privileges? What about people who drive an El Camino? Or doorless Jeeps? If you own any of these, email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net) so John can make an appointment to kick you in the balls. Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Nov 5, 2008. We begin this week by asking whether amazon.com's experiments in changing the prices of items according to the interest and loyalty of customers are a good idea or a bad idea. What about changing the price of cold soda depending on how hot it is? Regardless of whether the idea is any good, it does make John predictably angry, which is somehow rewarding. What do you think? Should loyalty be rewarded or punished? Let us know via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). We don't actually care what you think, but asking fulfils my obligation to write a couple of lines for this episode's description, and gets the tricky insertion of our email address out of the way. Awesome! Anyway, after quite a lot of discussion, we decide to conduct a couple of experiments of our own to see if Amazon is doing anything shady in settings its prices. You can play along with us if you have a computer with Internet access and nothing better to do. Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Oct 28, 2008. We begin this special holiday episode by trying to name five things to carve at Halloween other than pumpkins. (It's not very nice to the pumpkins, after all.) You can play along, but remember where to stick your candle. And all wooden things count together. Why can't pumpkin insides be a mash of non-stringy mush? It's just confusing. If you can help clear up the confusion, let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Then in Urban Legend, Warren tells us about the increased risk of zombification that arises when people are regularly hypnotized. Do you or your friends show any symptoms? Listen and we will reveal the two things that will certainly decrease your risk of turning into a zombie, presuming that's a bad thing. Voila! Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Oct 18, 2008. Today's episode is full of provocative questions again. Get ready by polishing up your helmet for sportage, in which we discuss whether looking so good should be penalized, and for how long. How about looking so bad? Even in hockey? Maybe a free kick? Is this all related to the insurance industry? Then in Foody Goody, Warren describes his morning diet. Do you know a good gastroenterologist who might be able to sort out his guts? Let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Also, can you tell us how big pea nuts should be? Have you tried wasabi-covered strawberries? Not even in a salad dressing? What's so special about special K? Does it just stand for Kereal? Does T-bone believe in segues? Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Oct 8, 2008. Our episode starts with another refreshing segment of "Alcoholics Says", featuring a very loud drink, apparently newly invented by Luc. It's not very good, but perhaps better than its name suggests. You'll understand if you listen. Then in Foody Goody, we continue our long-delayed "What Am I Eating: Liquid Edition" contest, which T-bone hosts with more flourish than usual in an effort to give us a sense of the drink's texture. Play along and see if you can guess what T-bone is quaffing, and to whom. And how is pudding gargled? Tell us your experience by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Oct 2, 2008. This week's inventions and shit brought to you by Baba Ghanoush. You too could be featured in a Limited Appeal episode! Just email us with your ideas for a segment (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Anyway, Anfern-- sorry, Baba, suggests scratch and sniff underwear as a new invention. Turns out there are many scenarios in which this could be useful, including those pesky times when you can hardly stand the freshness of your underpants. If anyone is still listening, we'll also tell you why T-bone is perhaps always surrounded by exactly 400 people, and discuss whether scratching your ass is more or less embarrassing than farting. Another classic episode of Limited Appeal, even before we discuss the proper placement of brakelights during a hailstorm! Did I mention we're not big on segues? Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Sep 25, 2008. In case you were expecting us to tell you when you're meant to laugh while listening to this, you're in luck! Given that our podcast has limited appeal, we thought we would help you out by providing a laugh track on this one episode. In the first controversial segment, we try to name five sitcoms that the world would be better off without. See if you agree with our choices. Then in Good Idea/Bad Idea, we discuss whether laugh tracks are a good idea or a bad idea. We put some extra effort into making sure you're focussed on our show, by giving you lots of laugh track pauses. But I think we've found the right balance so the laugh track is barely noticeable, and certainly not annoying. If we're wrong, once you stop laughing you can email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net) to tell us we suck. Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Sep 18, 2008. Once again we come to the rescue for a curious listener who asked the titular question of google, and somehow landed at our site. Since until now we had little to help our new friend, we've decided to remedy things by answering his query. Maybe. Alternatively, we might just start digressing about whether birds get drunk, and then how to explain drinking scotch at work to your boss, and then maybe the preferred snackable form for alcohol dehydrogenase, or why the ancient egyptians performed circumcisions, and how. Or maybe this was all about cats. Look, if you want us to stay on topic, at least articulate your question in an interpretable form. Jackass! Anyway, we somehow answer the dude's question in the end ­ listen to find out how we figured it out. And send us your questions directly by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Sep 12, 2008. In today's Nature Walk, Warren asks Luc whether there is such a thing as a Liger. Spoiler alert: yes there is. We're not sure about Jagther or hybrids of pandas and jaguars, or hybrids involving only male cats. But we have learned that google images has great photos of cross species mating! Then Luc discusses his trip to Africa. Did he spot any ligers? Spoiler alert: no. In spite of this upsetting absence of ligers as well as museums, he did nearly run over a cheetah, and he saw an enormous and aggressively horny bull elephant, leaking from multiple orifices. (Or is it orifi?) Spoiler alert: he survived. Express your disappointment with the prematurely revelatory nature of this description by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Sep 4, 2008. We begin by trying to name five things: lands, but we end up asking many more questions than we can answer in this episode. Can you help us? Is Greenland a country? Is Luseland a land? Can you name 5 Reichs? What is your dependency status? Is Scotland a country or just a nation? Does Greenland have its own soccer team? Who plays for the Vatican's side? Have you ever eaten while crapping? (You should have been expecting a poo question in here somewhere.) Is the problem swallowing or chewing? Continuously or continually? Are you sick of these questions? Why? Would you like to email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net)? Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Aug 27, 2008. We begin by asking whether clairvoyant people ever mistake their memories of the future for memories of the past. We're so meta! Then in Foody Goody, Warren announces that we've all been eating bananas from the wrong end. Turns out, you're supposed to eat the bottom first, although now that I think of it, if you're one of the few who already knows this, then you'll probably start eating from the wrong end as a result of our advice. Anyway, it turns out there are lots of pros and cons for banana reversing, so you'll have supporters either way. If you're passionate about banana eating methods, or if you're a monkey and care to enlighten us about your technique (for eating bananas, flinging poo, or masturbating), please email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Aug 13, 2008. Warren begins this week by asking what is with the Dark Knight movie. Is it cursed, or a series of coincidences? Or poetry? All of the above? How much hoc is involved? Then in ETWTF we try explaining the Olympic opening ceremonies to an alien. If you are permanently employed as an opening ceremonies performer or planner, please email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net) to explain what the point is, and why it's so hard for you to manipulate your box. T-bone wakes up just in time to make a thoroughly confusing (and apparently obscence) contribution, and then we close with some brief comments on the late Bernie Mac. RIP Bernie, however old you are. Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Aug 7, 2008. This week we'll rush through things, because T-bone needs to shower off before meeting his male friend. John's leg-ass slapping makes Warren think about two-headed dogs for some reason. Then John relates his own dogging story, which involves all kinds of water sports. As usual, the amusement comes at John's expense. Then we make a decision tree concerning what a dog should do towards objects that smell like other dogs. Finally, Warren reminds everyone about the sex habits of Luc's dog. Have you ever used ropes in sex play? If yes, you might want to meet Relic. Email us to set it up (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Jul 31, 2008. In case you were expecting us to have a few episodes without talking about defecating, this is what you get. In this week's Urban Legend, Warren exposes the truth about cats, milk, and diarrhoea. If you have a cat you might be disturbed to learn about what is best for it. Then Luc describes one of the (many) seminars he has seen about poop. In this case, he describes a lion scat full of quills from the porcupine he had eaten. Ouch! Why didn't he just eat meat? Finally, T-bone reveals a frightening but amusing lack of understanding about excretory physiology. If you work for the Ex-Lax company, please explain your brand name to us via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Jul 24, 2008. After John spanks T-bone and threatens to get out the genital cuff, Warren asks us whether Bob Saget has gone nuts as a way of psychologically coping with the Full House days. Listen and you might find out why Bob Saget got the part and whether James Earl Jones was involved. Then in a new Good Idea/Bad Idea segment, Warren asks us to consider the ethics of provoking seizures and migraines in epilectics. Is it morally equivalent to exploiting or decapacitating the deaf? These are important problems, even if decapacitate was not a word until just now. If you can help John and his bugs with some directions, let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Jul 14, 2008. In this week's nature walk, Warren, uses a racial slur that he learned from a DJ, and then offends the French for good measure! Can you come up with a better slur for Belgian colonialists than us? Probably. Send them to us by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Anyway, Warren finally gets round to telling us about macaques, and their high mating frequencies. Then Luc explains what he knows about lion sex, and why it's better to share if you're a male lion, and why females might prefer to be homosexual. Naturally, this leads to reacharound talk. What else were you expecting? Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Jul 3, 2008. Luc starts this week's episode wondering about going through life talking like a fourth grader writing an exam. Warren tries it out, but has some troubles. Then we move into our "What would it take" segment, where we discuss what it would take for us to shave off all of our body hair. This leads us into a discussion of pricing of ass hair removal, which T-bone seems to know a lot about... most likely because of all his hottub adventures. Tell us about some of your hottub adventures at maskedman@limitedappeal.net. Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Jun 23, 2008. Do you know the adjective form of the word adjective? It's like "deer", or something. If that's not clear, have a listen and you'll soon figure it out, maybe. Then join us on a nature walk, where we'll discuss tuna recruitment. Sign up today! You'll be treated to a riveting discussion of aquaculture and stem cells. Listen and see if anyone mentions salmon before Warren, or if he's cheaply trying to excuse a musical interlude. Finally, the conversation degrades (as you might have predicted) into talk about John releasing clouds of ejaculate on the side of the road. Luc tries to rerail the discussion by bringing up sneaky fuckers, which makes John wonder why the big dude doesn't notice a massive cloud of foreign sperm whenever he mates. If you can explain this as a sneaker, an alpha male, or a female mimic, please send us an email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Jun 11, 2008. This week we find ourselves back on a Nature Walk when Warren asks if there is an Animal Kingdom equivalent to a strip club. This leads to the surprisingly contested revelation that most animals don't wear clothes, since that appears to be required for stripping, unless of course you include sheep that shear themselves. Those sexy sheep are asking for it! Then T-bone points out that dogs with coats are really just accentuating their nude bottom halves. Disturbing, eh? It's even more disturbing when you realize that their owners are responsible for this emphasis of the genitals. Finally, Luc presents a little natural history that is promptly and predictably distorted. Do you think peacocks are more likely to attend a brothel or a strip club? Let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Jun 3, 2008. We open with lots of dramatic music to emphasize the exciting nature of this episode. We return to the Superhero's Phone Booth to discuss a Romanian superhero: Pumaman! Don't be terrified, because Pumaman only uses his Puma-abilities, death-feigning skills, and confusing nomenclature for non-evil purposes. Does this guy remind you of Manimal? Us too. It might even have been the same show. Then we learn that there are lots of words for pumas. How many can you come up with? Finally, Warren reveals the weakness in Pumaman's death feigning ability, which is a total lack of control over when it happens and how long it lasts. If you can think of any way that fainting would be effective against shit-throwing gorillas or other villains, email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

May 27, 2008. The image for T-bone's Skype profile gets us talking about boobs and defensive eye position (except in water, which is a totally different ball park, of course). For those of you who didn't know the relationship between boobs and predation, you're welcome. In Foody Goody, we present part 3 of round 2 of What Am I Eating (Liquid Edition). See if you can guess what Warren is drinking (and to whom) based on very few audio clues! If you don't care, that probably reflects a healthy perspective on what is important, and what is ridiculously pointless. Assuming you can be bothered, feel free to email us to express your indifference (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

May 20, 2008. Warren kicks off the week by announcing his upcoming trip to Florida, which initiates a brainstorming session in which we try to avoid copyright infringement regarding the behaviour of drunken women at spring break and their boobs. Then in Pooh Corner, Luc asks what the world should do to compensate for the mistreatment of homosexuals during the holocaust. Says, our suggestion is likely to offend almost everyone, even though, contrary to Warren's first impression, we're NOT suggesting the rounding-up of anyone. The result really would be like Cape Cod, but with show tunes! If you want to support our idea, send us an email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

May 13, 2008. This evening, we bring you some tomato-flavoured muffcake. Warren uses the Rotten Tomatoes scale to determine the "best" song in the world, or at least the song that the most people did not find objectionable. But John quickly fucks up Warren's candidate. Is this a good way to categorize things? Tell us whether you think the rotten tomatoes scale is objectionable or not by giving it a thumbs up or down, and sending it to our email address (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). In Foody Goody, we decide what the difference is between a muffin and a cupcake. This turns out to be a very touchy subject, mainly because John is a testy bitch. Nevertheless, we finally agree on the difference. Listen to hear about our long-awaited solution to this important problem! Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

May 6, 2008. This week's superhero's phone booth is filled with a sultry girl gorilla. Would it even get to the point where she gets shit thrown at her? Turns out she's got large breasts. Does that change anything? A swollen ass? A G-string? No? Well, then you and Warren don't share tastes in sultry gorillas. Next, Warren insists we all know the song by ZZ Top, She's Got Legs. What is the feminine version of the line, "She's got legs, she knows how to use them"? I'm sure you have better ideas than we do. Let us know via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Apr 29, 2008. In this week's Polish the Bishop segment, Warren asks us to change an existing euphemism so that it refers to something less offensive than it currently does. He probably wants to avoid having to think about the horrific behaviour involved in the current definition, but ironically, he just succeeds in burning some imagery into the rest of us (and you too, if you dare to listen). Fucker. What is the preferred way to serve chopped up penises? Send your recipes by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Then T-bone suggests that the chili dog is mainly for people who have sex with their enemies. Luc realizes (far too late) that the segment has gone terribly wrong. You'll probably agree whether or not you manage to listen to the whole episode. Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Apr 23, 2008. We launch this week with an especially exasperating version of a Name 5 Things/Foody Goody crossover, in which Warren asks us to name 5 animals other than a pig from which one can obtain bacon, given that the definition of bacon is "a side of a pig, cured and smoked". Doesn't that sound riveting? Well maybe not, but I haven't even started to describe the undiscovered (until now) linguistic and anatomical problems involved in this. Be prepared, as we loosen a few definitions, among other things. If you know whether turkey fat is healthy or not, let us know via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Apr 15, 2008. We begin this episode by discovering how hard it is to replace every single "u" in any word with "me". It's trme, even if it is infmeriating. Then we ask why Sm-me-rfs are bl-me. OK, fuck it, we ask why Smurfs are blue (perhaps for the second time). Is their singing just a cover for village wide depression, or are they not getting enough oxygen? And is their size related to the presence of lungs? This topic gets Luc angry about insect-related liberties taken by Hollywood over the years, including the male-ness of the protagonist in Seinfeld's Bee Movie. Warren decides this issue requires us to deliver another ultimatum, which is as pointless as ever. If, in your standing as a spokesbee, you wish to clarify your shoe-wearing status, send us an email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Apr 9, 2008. Even more goody foody! Luc hosts this segment in our continuation of "What am I eating: liquid edition." He produces some weird sounds that may or may not come from his pants. In the course of the guessing, we discuss the Hartford Whalers, the marriage of Dave Simonot way back when, and whether being a sex slave depends on whether you enjoy it. We also provide some useful advice for life, including: "Just sit there and take it!", which is good advice for working your way through a drink with a bead-filled straw, or for listening to an episode of Limited Appeal, for that matter. If you work for Nestle and want to buy us headsets in appreciation for plugging your products, contact us via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Apr 1, 2008. Our mail sack has been punched once again, but this time we asked for it. Warren had submitted our feed to the website Culture.ca, who (wisely) rejected our application to be listed. The reason they gave us was that we "use an abundance of coarse language. For the moment we are not able to inform our users on this, yakkety, yakkety, blah, blah". Fuckers! We're waiting for the moment that technology is invented, so the public from Culture.ca can finally overcome their antipathy towards human tails. If you have any ideas for content we could include in a special podcast just for culture.ca, let us know via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Mar 25, 2008. Mmmmm, foody goody! Warren asks what other types of ketchup there are other than tomato. That of course necessitates us defining the ketchup continuum, and describing the controversial difference between ketchup and marmalade. Listen and discover if you agree! You may also want to imagine a visit to our backwards delivery restaurant, which may or may not mean exactly what you think it does. Then, after a quick stop by wikipedia, we discover that our ridiculus ketchup ideas were tame by the standards of the Middle Ages back in the 40's. Do you have crazy ketchup experiences to relate to us? Let us know via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Mar 19, 2008. Good morning friends! This week we discuss the ribald adventures of Timmy, the Energy Bear. He's got all kinds of good qualities, provided you like a few extras photons and don't have a pacemaker, a defibrillator, or battery-operated implants. Predictably, the idea of battery operated breast implants gets T-bone rather excited, and for some reason he starts imagining all kinds of ass-related operating procedures for them. You'll have to listen to hear his reasoning. What kind of controls would you like for your boobs? Let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Mar 10, 2008. In this episode we inaugurate a new segment, called "Who the fuck cares?" John predicts his perpetual answer, but by the end of the segment he has completely changed his mind. In the first edition, Warren derides musical theatre, mainly because of the continual singing. He also ruins Phantom of the Opera for T-Bone by revealing (SPOILER ALERT!!) that it is stupid. Finally, John tries to reach out (or is it around?) to Warren by agreeing that show tunes outside the context of musicals are gay. If you care to suggest a topic that we might care or not care about, email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Mar 4, 2008. Welcome to season 3! (3) We are at least as surprised as you are that our podcast has, to date, featured such an unlimited number of ridiculous topics and equally ridiculous perspectives on them. We'll be equally surprised if the 10,000th download gets anything in the mail. Meh. We start our third season with Round 2 of "What Am I Eating?": Liquid Edition. Just as in Round 1, each of us will eat something (er, drink something) and the others need to guess what is being drunk, and to whom. Why, you ask? Good point. Anyway, our guesswork is a bizarrely satisfying exercise if you like pointless reacharound-directed contests. If you do, stay tuned for the continuation of our contest in a future episode. If not, hopefully you like a bit of disappointment. Send us your responses by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.